G4: Intersectionality in Action Human Interest Piece

I wrote a human interest piece directed at the readers of magazines like Jet, discussing how their internalized and external homophobia affects our community, specifically, their own children.

Imagine with me for a moment: you are a young black girl, say 14 or 15. You come from a single-parent household, it’s just you and your mother, just like almost 70% of other Black kids in America. She works hard so that you can live comfortably but you’re going through a lot at the moment. School is hard and it’s about to get harder, all of your friends are starting to show their true colors and you’re running out of people to trust, and to top it all off, there’s this girl that you can’t stop thinking about. You’ve been friends with this girl for a while now. You talk about anything, everything, and sometimes nothing at all. You spend more time with her than anyone else. You have all these feelings for and about her and you don’t really know what they mean. You’ve only had these feelings maybe once before; probably for some guy a while ago but it was nothing like this. You get these butterflies every time you’re with her. It confuses you so you go to ask your most trusted confidant, your mother. She’s basically your best friend. You always go to her when you need something and she’s always there with open ears and open arms; she always understands. You gush about the girl, going on and on about little details that nobody else would even notice, let alone find important enough to share with someone else. You keep it up for what feels like hours. When you finally stop to catch a breath, you ask your mom what all this means. She says nothing. She stares at you for a while, speechless. You have no idea what she’s thinking. She has this look in her eyes, sort of disappointed, sort of angry, you can’t really put your finger on it but it ain’t good. Next thing you know, you’re in a screaming match and all your stuff is on the sidewalk.

This is not a hypothetical situation.

I have seen and heard this story a few too many times. Black parents, do you know what you’re setting your kids up for when you kick them out of your house for being queer? They’re forced to fend for themselves, by any means necessary. About 5-7% of youth are homeless. LGBT youth make up 40% of that population; almost half of that 40% is made up of our kids. They’re out there on the streets, trying to keep warm in the winter and fighting over food in shelters. When they have nobody left to turn to, they’ll turn to anyone offering them help, no matter what the conditions are. They’re exchanging sexual favors for basic necessities that they should be getting from home. If they’re caught as sex-workers, they can be picked up by cops.

Our kids are already at a disadvantage for police brutality and incarceration.

Putting them out will only increase their chances of getting arrested, hurt, or even killed. You know how the police are these days. You know how the world is these days.

Be honest, is the life and well-being of your own flesh and blood child less important than who they love? Are you willing to risk their health, safety, and sanity just because you don’t understand them or disagree with their preferences? These are our children. Are we really willing to just throw them to the mercy of this cruel world in the name of being holy? If so, how holy does that make you?